“You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will
prevail.” -Proverbs 19:21
Job 38,40
2 “Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words? 3 Brace yourself like a man, because I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.”
4 Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?
8 Who kept the sea inside its boundaries, this far and no farther will you come.
41 Who provides food for the ravens when their young cry out to God in hunger?
2 “Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words? 3 Brace yourself like a man, because I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.”
4 Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?
8 Who kept the sea inside its boundaries, this far and no farther will you come.
41 Who provides food for the ravens when their young cry out to God in hunger?
2
“Do
you still want to argue with the Almighty?
You are God’s critic, but do you have the answers?”
8 Will you discredit my justice and condemn me just to prove you are right?
9 Are you as strong as God? Can you thunder with a voice like his?
14 How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. 15 What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” 16 Otherwise you are boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil. 17 Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it. –James 4:13-17
As I start this chapter, I’m thinking, life is too busy. Too many things. Too overwhelming. There is no time to work, study, learn, and
plan where God wants me to be and really think about what He’s will is for my
life. Busy-ness makes me ignore
life. Sweep everything under the rug to
deal with them later. I live like I know
I have another day to deal with unresolved business and unconfronted
transgressions. You are God’s critic, but do you have the answers?”
8 Will you discredit my justice and condemn me just to prove you are right?
9 Are you as strong as God? Can you thunder with a voice like his?
14 How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. 15 What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” 16 Otherwise you are boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil. 17 Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it. –James 4:13-17
I realized that even if I do my best to plan life well, experiences tell me that God ALWAYS change my plans. Though I don’t get what I ask for, He somehow makes things more beautiful than what I can ever ask for or achieve on my strength alone…
If my desire is to be the ‘apple of God’s eyes,’ am I spending enough time in front of God’s face enough to see myself in His eyes?
As I sip my cup of hot Aztec spicy mocha espresso latte from the Flying Goat Café in downtown Santa Rosa, I am struggling to wrap my mind around how apparently complex life is, and at the same time, how paradoxically simple life is…
Is God really the center of my life? Is He the apple of my eye? Well, OF COURSE NOT IF I’M SO SELF ABSORBED! I think about myself all the time. I worry about my future. I worry about my relationships. I worry about what people think of me. I worry about my debts. I worry about my performance at work. I worry about EVERYTHING! My mind won’t let me go. My guilt won’t let me go. My shame won’t let me go. My own unforgiveness won’t let me go! SELF-OBSESSION…
Self-obsession makes me speed-walk unconsciously through crowds, splitting groups of people, with my head buried between my shoulders and my eyes piercing through the ground… consciously, attentively, focusedly… lost… marinated in my own thoughts that swirled around a soupy existence of cosmic conglomeration of thoughts. Thoughts that integrate at the same time disintegrate. Grasping the fog… Head in the cloud or in the concrete? Ying-Yang?
Ironic,
I don’t think about things that are going right.
Just like my mind don’t tend to highlight areas in life that are functioning healthily and correctly,
I don’t think about my body, the wonder of it all, the miracle that it is self sustaining and self healing. What kind of creative wisdom God must have put into it… it is incredible!
I don’t think about people around me. The masses are like props or extras on a movie set.
I don’t think about how my actions right now is impacting or changing the future of myself, my family or the world.
I don’t think about my age.
What is on my mind?
To become debt free
Incongruence of various life compartments
Most of all:
I fear being made ineffective and unable to accomplish God’s will and His purpose for my life!
Desperate, I need solutions for my paralysis.
Just like my mind don’t tend to highlight areas in life that are functioning healthily and correctly,
I don’t think about my body, the wonder of it all, the miracle that it is self sustaining and self healing. What kind of creative wisdom God must have put into it… it is incredible!
I don’t think about people around me. The masses are like props or extras on a movie set.
I don’t think about how my actions right now is impacting or changing the future of myself, my family or the world.
I don’t think about my age.
What is on my mind?
To become debt free
Incongruence of various life compartments
Most of all:
I fear being made ineffective and unable to accomplish God’s will and His purpose for my life!
Desperate, I need solutions for my paralysis.
We all have worries… I think it really reflect a basic trust
issue I have for God. Same principle
applies when anyone reads the Bible or approach any topic of discussion that is
worth pondering… the root of the issue at hand is ALWAYS SPIRITUAL. The apparent and surface issues may be
physical, it may be relational, it may be unacceptable expectations, it may be
traumatic, it may be extremely sad or happy, it may be out of your control… Stress… Anxiety… Depression… unhealthy
compensations…But the deep: …SPIRITUAL…
Control issues? …SPIRITUAL…
This has never come up to me before! Today is the first day I realized that I have control and trust issues with God! Once He has enlightened my heart, I have to address it now!
REQUESTS:This has never come up to me before! Today is the first day I realized that I have control and trust issues with God! Once He has enlightened my heart, I have to address it now!
God please give me strength and ability to release my control and stress and trust to you. God show me what You want me to do today! It takes effort to hear from God. I must re-organize my life to put God first, rather than my own worries. I have to die to the process of myself in this world. May God increase as I decrease. I have to let go of my job, family, relationships, and myself. God, please remove my distractions that take place of You in my heart/mind/soul. Please lift the thick veil that is covering my eyes and the eyes of those around me so that we can experience a truly fulfilled life and become the ‘Apple of Your Eye.’
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